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husband wants a divorce???

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Silverkitten 1
bjkbb 1

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bjkbb --- 4 years ago -

My husband is deployed...and we had a plan on how we would budget our money during deployment to get us ahead. Well i decided to try this mary kay thing and invested more then i was making and ended up loosing more then i made. not to mention i quit my job to do it full time and had taken a loan out for the inventory and didn't mention it to my husband. i was working really hard and wanted to surprise him with all the money i had made and all the hard work i had done. but things slowly started crashing down and my business went from really good to down the drain. he then found out about everything i had done (he knew i had quit my job just not the loan part) and was very hurt and disappointed in my which i totally understand i know i made a HUGE mistake and got us in debt rather then getting us ahead. well i have been looking for a job for months now and havent had any luck yet but now hes so mad about everything that i have done that he wants a divorce, says he has already talked to a jag officer but is choosing to wait till he is home to actually file, i am devastated i love my husband beyond words hes my best friend and our daughters father. i dont want this to happen and im not sure what to do. im trying as hard as i can to get enough money to pay off everything as soon as possible without making him do it. but he refuses to talk about us anymore and only wants to talk about what going to happen when he gets home. i know i made a mistake but i dont want to lose him. i cant make myself believe that the last time i will kiss or hug my husband was when i said goodbye for deployment... please no judging i know i have made my mistakes. i just need advice... 

Silverkitten --- 4 years ago -

Let me start by saying I will be praying for your family. You might do well to post this same thing on Rileyunderground this one is dead most of the time. If you want more advice I would recommend that.

Don't give up hope, your husband might change his mind once he sees you and his little girl. Love never stops even when you are angry. It's easy to be mad and say things when you are a long ways away, but face to face it is different. He is mad now but give him time and don't push him, he might get over it. Are we talking about a large amount of money? If it's not a big amount then maybe you can pay it off when taxes come in. Try praying for your husband, and your marriage. Do things to help him remember why he fell in love with you. Send him little love notes (E-mail, post office mail, text...) letting him know you are thinking of him. Tell him how you feel without getting angry. Tell him how you did it for him, how you wanted him to be proud of you, and how you just made a bad investment. Avoid fighting or anger if at all possible. My family went through something similar. He was the one spending the money though. He spend a large amount of money that I felt he had just pissed away. I was where your hubby is, I was threatening divorce. We fought over E-mail and sent each other hurt full words. (This was before Skype and Face-time and phone calls were few and far between.) After a month of this nonsense, he admitted he messed up and started doing things to show his love. When he got back we were so happy to see each other that our money problem seemed silly and unimportant. I pray this is what happens with your marriage. If you need anything or just someone to talk to then please message me. Good luck and God bless. 

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